- note: need to check mice eating behavior when fed,
- might want to add a section where she actually handles and feeds them
-
Emily closes the cage and puts the <whatever they feed the mice>
back into the cupboard. She does something related
to taking care of the mice, steps out into the hallway, and
@@ -87,24 +83,23 @@
3 – 5 – 2 – 1 – Enter. The keypad beeps with every button press. A computer voice announces - Access authorized. The door to the main - control center module slides up and she steps through. The module - contains one large room with rows of integrated computer equipment desks - arranged need a fitting description of what a - mission control rom looks like. The wall to the left that most of - the seats are facing is completely taken up by a panorama window into - the biosphere, an even larger module with a ceiling of glass and support - beams completely taken up by plant life, trees, small animals, and a big - pond. The wall to the right holds a large status panel with some - seven-segment displays for information and lots of big status indicator - symbols. + Access authorized and the door slides + up. She steps through into the main control center. The module contains + one large room with rows of integrated computer equipment desks arranged + need a fitting description of what a mission + control rom looks like. The wall to the left that most of the + seats are facing is completely taken up by a panorama window into the + biotope, an even larger module with a ceiling of glass and support beams, + completely filled with plant life, trees, small animals, and a big pond. + The wall to the right holds a large status panel with some seven-segment + displays for information and lots of big status indicator symbols.
Emily walks down the shallow stairs towards the panorama window. In front of the window are tables and chairs that were moved there recently as the room had become more of a general hangout spot for the remaining - people when they were still around. Lena sits at one of them, - preparing something while waiting for her. + people when there still more than just Lena and her. Lena sits at one of + them, cutting a bread into slices while waiting for her.
missing dialog about food and starting to eat
@@ -115,64 +110,18 @@
turn on. Some of the status indicators on the back wall start blinking.
A large, green triangle with the letters LINK next to it flickers and
then lights up. Emily looks at it in confusion.
- What does that light mean? She gestures
- towards it.
+ What's going on?
That's them.
Earth people?
Yes, Lena replies while quickly
- finishing her meal, they said they'd try
- to get a phone connection going.
- As if on cue, the phone on the large center console begins to ring. Lena
- gets up and walks over, Emily follows her. note:
- might need to imply that Lena is very sick Lena sits down in
- front of it, picks up the receiver, and presses a few buttons.
- The speaker on the console starts crackling and hissing. Through the
- noise, they hear a faint voice. Lena leans over to a microphone and
- talks into it:
- We can't hear you, one moment.
-
- She flips some switches on the console. The speaker cracles some more,
- then a loud pop, then silence. The smell of magic smoke is in the air.
-
- Lena turns to a terminal and starts typing.
- note to self: missing establishing connection
- note to self: add some data corruption
-
-MOON-01 > This hasn't been maintained in forever. I think the - phone just went. -EARTH-53> You may wanna check the modules under P2 for burnt components. -MOON-01 > I know. -MOON-01 > We have another problem somewhere along the line. There's - apparently more noise than signal. --
- Lena opens a cover with a small label "P2", pulls two cards
- out of their sockets, and inspects them. One has a big black burn mark
- right in the center. She turns to Emily:
- Can you fetch me this module from another
- phone?
-
- And? Michelle asks Jack as he looks up
- from the terminal.
- Weak signal - and they need to fix their
- phone.
- James asks What about that plan B of
- increasing the transmit power?
- Meh. Jack doesn't seem too
- enthusiastic about it.
- TODO: Dialog. They decide not to increase the
- power before double-checking that everything is aligned properly. Sure
- enough, they're off by a bit.
- Request for comment: Does this make the story more interesting or is it
- confusing? I originally didn't want to do perspective changes
- within chapters, and I still might not, but this was too good of an idea
- not to write it down.
+ finishing her meal, They have some abilities
+ to remotely control things – including turning on the main radio
+ transmitter.
+ She gets up and asks Emily to follow her to one of the consoles with a
+ terminal. She sits down in front of it, logs on and enters a few
+ commands.
- note to self: After fixing the alignment, pick up on the moon and - continue. + corrupted chat, the connection has deteriorated in comparison to before
Copyright © 2023 Jan Danielzick (aka. BodgeMaster) – All rights reserved.