From 747688c40ffcab79e786058446371e255836549f Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001
From: BodgeMaster <>
Date: Tue, 9 Jan 2024 19:00:59 +0100
Subject: [PATCH] 02 Unlikely encounter: revision (mostly language
 improvements)

---
 02-Unlikely_Encounter-Annie-intro.html | 30 +++++++++++++-------------
 1 file changed, 15 insertions(+), 15 deletions(-)

diff --git a/02-Unlikely_Encounter-Annie-intro.html b/02-Unlikely_Encounter-Annie-intro.html
index 3b90a2a..a7654a9 100644
--- a/02-Unlikely_Encounter-Annie-intro.html
+++ b/02-Unlikely_Encounter-Annie-intro.html
@@ -157,8 +157,8 @@ AgriWorks Login: &#9608;
   or be annoyed. Also, this place,
   <span class="quote non-speech">Cryo&nbsp;Facility&nbsp;53</span>, she had
   never heard of it. The only one who might know more about it is her
-  grandpa, as he used to work for the power company and had studied the
-  plans of the city very thoroughly. So she dials his number...
+  grandpa, as he had studied the plans of the city very thoroughly during
+  his time at the power company. So she dials his number...
 </p>
 <p>
   Annie is greeted by the friendly voice of an old man. After
@@ -179,11 +179,11 @@ AgriWorks Login: &#9608;
   the start.</span><br />
   <span class="quote speech">How?</span><br />
   <span class="quote speech">Cryogenic sleep - it&apos;s a way to preserve
-  people for a log time. It was thought to be impossible for a long time
-  but they somehow made it work just before the apocalypse happened.</span>
+  people for a log time by essentially freezing them. It was thought to be
+  impossible for a long time but they made it work just before the
+  apocalypse happened.</span>
   <br />
-  <span class="quote speech">He&apos;s one from the old world? Doesn&apos;t
-  that mean that he&apos;s way over a hundred years old?</span><br />
+  <span class="quote speech">He&apos;s one from the old world?</span><br />
 </p>
 <ul>
   <li class="comment">
@@ -207,10 +207,10 @@ AgriWorks Login: &#9608;
 <p>
   A cup of juice and two cookies later, she hears the telephone ring in the
   basement. Annie grabs another cookie and hurries back down the stairs.
-  She makes it to the desk just in time for the phone to stop ringing. The
-  text on the terminal disappears. She looks back and forth between the
-  phone and the terminal for a moment. A new message appears. She sits down
-  and replies:
+  She makes it to the desk just in time for it to stop ringing. The text on
+  the terminal disappears. She looks back and forth between the phone and
+  the terminal for a moment. A new message appears. She sits down and
+  replies:
 </p>
 
 <pre class="terminal">
@@ -338,11 +338,11 @@ AgriWorks Login: &#9608;
 <p>
   Annie closes the door behind herself and locks it. As she takes a breath
   of the slightly humid air, she steps back onto the sidewalk to look at
-  the clock above the entrance... 8:25 PM - the realization of how much
-  time had passed hits: Normally she&apos;d be at home already. She starts
-  walking towards the metro station at the corner. The buildings here are
-  similar to the ones in <span class="comment">Wohngebieten?</span> - three
-  to four story houses painted in different colors - but they are lacking
+  the clock above the entrance... 8:25 PM &ndash; the realization of how
+  much time had passed hits: Normally she&apos;d be at home already. She
+  starts walking towards the metro station at the corner. The buildings
+  here are similar to the ones in residential areas &ndash; three to four
+  story houses painted in different colors &ndash; but they are lacking
   balconies and, instead of being homes, they mostly house offices. On the
   other side of the street is an embankment that holds the rails for the
   metro and beyond that is the outer wall of the dome. The street lights