'mb' First Steps Outside: language improvements and get rid of contrived section

I didn't like how that section where they return to the train turned out.
(As mentioned in the comment directly following it...)
So I removed it.

mb-First_Steps_Outside.html

@@ -19,8 +19,8 @@
   over a bunch of bushes and tall flowers that have taken root on the
   tracks before coming to a halt next to a staircase in the center of the
   platform.<br />
-  <span class="speech">Exit to the right</span>, he says in unison with the
+  <span class="speech">Exit to the right</span>, Jack says in unison with
-  automated voice while turning the switch for the doors and gesturing
+  the automated voice while turning the switch for the doors and gesturing
   towards the passenger area.<br />
   <span class="speech">After you.</span>
 </p>
@@ -38,13 +38,14 @@
   <span class="speech">Welcome to the outside world. Wanna take a quick
   look around?</span><br />
   She gets up.<br />
-  <span class="speech">Sure.</span>
+  <span class="speech">Sure.</span><br />
+  Jack uses a key to close the door and they get going.
 </p>
 <p>
-  They walk down a flight of stairs taking them to a tunnel under the
+  The two walk down the flight of stairs in the center of the platform
-  platforms. The floor is covered in water so they follow a ledge on the
+  taking them to an underpass. The floor is covered in water so they follow
-  side. Jack leads Annie up the stairs to the last platform. From there,
+  a ledge on the side. Jack leads Annie up the stairs to the last platform.
-  they step outside through a side entrance.
+  From there, they step outside through a side entrance.
 </p>
 <p>
   Annie is hit by the light and warmth of the setting sun. She closes her
@@ -74,13 +75,13 @@
   <span class="speech">Be careful around old buildings.</span>
 </p>
 <p>
-  Cautiously stepping back to the edge, Annie looks down. Bushes cover the
+  Cautiously stepping back to the edge, Annie looks down. Bushes overgrow
-  hillside below the tall embankment wall that holds the station,
+  everything, covering the hillside below the tall sandstone wall holding
-  overgrowing everything. The walls of small ruins and half fallen-in
+  the embankment with the station. The walls of small ruins and half
-  fences stick out here and there, and the bushes are interrupted by what
+  fallen-in fences stick out here and there, and the bushes are interrupted
-  remains of roads and staircases. Small rivers cut through the landscape.
+  by what remains of roads and staircases. Small rivers cut through the
-  Annie looks up. The ruins further down the valley are larger the closer
+  landscape. Annie looks up. The ruins further down the valley are larger
-  they are to the center of the urban area below.<br />
+  the closer they are to the center of the urban area below.<br />
   <span class="speech">It&apos;s much bigger than &lt;dome city&gt;.</span>
   <br />
   <span class="speech">Many things are bigger than &lt;dome city&gt;.
@@ -95,32 +96,12 @@
 </p>
 <p>
   After pointing out some other notable landmarks, Jack decides it is time
-  to get going. He starts to lead the way, walking to the end of the end of
+  to get going. He starts to lead the way, walking towards the side of the
-  the station that they entered it from, before abruptly turning to Annie.
+  station that they arrived from. The balcony-like walkway connects to
-  <span class="speech">You know what we forgot?</span>
+  a wide staircase down from the end of the embankment where the mountain
-</p>
+  extends over the tunnels and the back wall of the station. It leads to a
-<p>
+  collapsed bridge next to a large waterfall. Annie marvels at the sheer
-  They return to the side entrance, walk down the stairs, follow the ledge,
+  amount of water flowing by, something that she had never before seen.
-  back up the stairs, and end up at the train. Annie puts the documents
-  back into her bag. Jack grabs the keys from the control panel
-  <span class="speech">just for good measure</span> and uses one of them to
-  close the door from the outside.
-</p>
-<p class="comment">
-  I don't like this. It feels too contrived. Would have been better if
-  Jack had just closed the door when they left the train and left it at
-  that. That also allows for a later scene where someone realizes that
-  the documents are still in the train.
-</p>
-<p>
-  Jack leads the way again, this time walking to the end of the platform
-  where the tunnels open up into the station. There, they use another
-  underpass taking them to the end of the balcony-like walkway. It
-  connects to a wide staircase down from the end of the embankment
-  where the mountain extends over the tunnels and the back wall of the
-  station. It leads to a collapsed bridge next to a large waterfall.
-  Annie marvels at the sheer amount of water flowing by, something that
-  she has never seen before.
 </p>
 <p>
   Jack goes ahead, climbing down the wall where the bridge used to begin
@@ -128,6 +109,8 @@
   to follow. After what feels like an eternity, she manages to get half-way
   down the wall.<br />
   <span class="speech">You can jump from there.</span><br />
+  <span class="comment">Something interesting needs to happen here.</span>
+  <br />
   They make their way across the fast-flowing river by stepping on large
   stones in the water, and continue through the bushes towards Outpost 53.
 </p>