'ja' Erosion: continue writing
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@ -30,8 +30,9 @@
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<span class="quote speech">You survived that?</span><br />
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<span class="quote speech">That was the least of my challenges.</span>
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<br />
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He chuckles and briefly tells her how he found himself trapped inside
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and that the people of the dome city helped him repair the door.
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He chuckles and briefly tells her how he found himself trapped inside,
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that one of the computer's hard drives is broken, and how he turned
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to the dome city for help.
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</p>
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<p>
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Michelle's dizziness starts to go away and the burning sensation
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@ -61,7 +62,6 @@
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starting with his preservaton chamber breaking down. It takes him about
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an hour, including answering Michelles questions.
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</p>
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<p class="comment">ToDo: tie this together</p>
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<p>
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<span class="quote speech">How have you been dealing with food?
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I imagine the stockpile was already pretty low?</span><br />
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@ -88,19 +88,31 @@
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and puts it back in the oven to re-heat them.
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</p>
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<p>
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<span class="comment">Idk they eat, guess I'll need to describe that
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in a bit more detail... Michelle might be having a really good and really
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bad time at the same time. Jack eats like three of them potatoes with
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roughly a ton of the dip. Then they get ready to leave.</span>
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After the meal, they step outside and Michelle gets her first look
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around.<br />
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<span class="quote speech">Oddly familiar, and yet so different.</span>
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<br />
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<span class="comment">the scene where Jack opens the door should
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have a short description of the lay of the lands</span><br />
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The two decide to walk up to a <span class="comment">crest? ridge?</span>
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not far from them on the other side of the valley. Beyond it is Ivydale,
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once a large city housing just over a million people – only one of
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<span class="comment">who? whom? which?</span> remains to behold its
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overgrown ruins.
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<br />
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Michelle says: <span class="quote speech">I mean I knew it already but
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seeing it like this just hits differently.</span><br />
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</p>
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<p>
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They step outside and, following what remains of the old path, start
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walking. It is narrow and winded, overgrown, and has partially
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disappeared. Jack walks ahead, only half following the path, half making
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it up as he goes. Michelle struggles to follow, slowly falling behind.
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After a while, he stops abruptly, looking down at something, then up,
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then down again. Then, he turns to Michelle who is catching up to him
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and says: <span class="quote speech">Well, that could be a reason why
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<span class="comment">ToDo: tie this back together</span><br />
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Following what remains of an old path, the two start making their way up
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the mountain above the bunker. The path is narrow and winded, overgrown,
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and has partially disappeared. Jack walks ahead, only half following it,
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half making it up as he goes. Michelle struggles to follow, slowly
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falling behind. After a while, he stops abruptly, looking down at
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something, then up, then down again. Then, he turns to Michelle who is
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just catching up and says:
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<span class="quote speech">Well, that could be a reason why
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the uplink is down – it literally <i>is down</i>...</span>.
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Michelle reaches the edge and and sees what Jack had stopped for:
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A large <span class="comment">ravine? wash?</span> extends towards the
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