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10 Commits

Author SHA1 Message Date
BodgeMaster 9c5e120c75 'oa' Lab Rat: remove redundant outline, format a line of dialog 2023-11-20 19:49:11 +01:00
BodgeMaster 59e01f69c1 'oa' (Emily lab incident) -> Lab Rat 2023-11-20 19:37:00 +01:00
BodgeMaster 50cadee22d 'pa' Basic Needs: Revision 2023-11-20 19:19:07 +01:00
BodgeMaster 0479d1af37 'ka' (finding the train) -> I Like Trains
ah yes, funny chapter name :^)
2023-11-15 08:58:55 +01:00
BodgeMaster 76a47b1177 'ka' (finding the train): revision 2023-11-15 08:50:54 +01:00
BodgeMaster 7fccce67ab 'va' Alone: continue writing 2023-11-14 09:03:03 +01:00
BodgeMaster d5592d24b7 'va' Alone: continue writing 2023-11-13 18:30:51 +01:00
BodgeMaster f28538de9c 'mb' First Steps Outside: reword a point in the outline to be more precise 2023-11-13 08:22:46 +01:00
BodgeMaster cb459197b2 notes/story: rewrite most of the file so it is more readable
The unfinished section is still Markdown.
2023-11-13 08:20:52 +01:00
BodgeMaster ae844cbe85 06 Library AT Night: remove redundant outline 2023-11-10 08:09:50 +01:00
7 changed files with 275 additions and 276 deletions

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@ -1,42 +1,6 @@
<!DOCTYPE html><html><head><title> Library At Night </title><link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="html_resources/style.css"></head><body><a href="index.html"><button class="back">&lt;</button></a>
<h1> Library At Night</h1>
<p class="comment">
If you are here just for reading, skip past the outline.
</p>
<p class="comment">
Outline:
</p>
<ul>
<li class="comment">
Annie and Isabelle go to library
<ul>
<li class="comment">
enter the place, find computer
</li>
<li class="comment">
turn it on (following rough instructions and figuring it out)
</lI>
<li class="comment">
figures out how to CLI (using instructions)
</li>
<li class="comment">
copy the file to a floppy disk
</li>
</ul>
</li>
<li class="comment">
One of them trips some sort of alarm before leaving? Idk.. Something
has to happen tho.
</li>
<li class="comment">
Annie drops the floppy and a note with Jack&apos;s number off at
Karl&apos;s place
</li>
<li class="comment">
Annie goes home and falls asleep
</li>
</ul>
<p>
11:30 PM - Isabelle and Annie find themselves at the side entrance to
the library. They try a couple keys before finding the right one. The

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@ -1,6 +1,6 @@
<!DOCTYPE html><html><head><title> &lt;chapter name&gt; </title><link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="html_resources/style.css"></head><body><a href="index.html"><button class="back">&lt;</button></a>
<!DOCTYPE html><html><head><title> I Like Trains </title><link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="html_resources/style.css"></head><body><a href="index.html"><button class="back">&lt;</button></a>
<h1> &lt;chapter name&gt;</h1>
<h1>I Like Trains</h1>
<p class="comment">
Context: They are exploring the Ivydale train yard
</p>
@ -10,15 +10,14 @@
track.<br />
<span class="quote speech">Where are you?</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">Up here.</span><br />
Jack had climbed onto the rather sketchy-looking roof of one of the
trains. Michelle climbs onto the link between cars and Jack helps her to
the top.<br />
<span class="comment"> Look,</span>
<span class="quote speech">Over there...</span><br />
Jack is standing on the rather sketchy-looking roof of one of the
trains. Michelle climbs onto the link between cars and Jack helps her
to the top.<br />
<span class="quote speech">Look, over there...</span><br />
He points across the deteriorating metro trains towards the outermost
track of the overgrown train yard. A small roof - or in places what
remains of it - extends over the track from the side of a large building.
Under the roof are several tank cars. Some are rusted through or missing
Several tank cars sit under it. Some are rusted through or missing
parts, but a few look like they might still hold liquids.<br />
<span class="quote speech">Oh, wow! Maybe there&apos;s some gas left in
there or something...</span><br />
@ -26,26 +25,27 @@
</p>
<p>
They climb back down and make their way over to one of the tank cars.
They climb onto the side of the car and Jack attempts to use the ladder
that leads to the top. It crumbles under his feet.<br />
<span class="quote speech">I guess I found the way down - hey, use me as a
ladder.</span><br />
He leans against the car and helps her onto the tank.
<span class="comment"> something missing? Idk </span>
Michelle inspects the lid.<br />
Jack clmbs onto the side of the car and attempts to use the ladder
leading to the top. It crumbles under his feet.
<span class="quote speech">I guess I found the way down - hey, use me as
a ladder.</span> He leans against the tank and helps her up on top of it.
</p>
<p>
Michelle inspects the lid. It&apos;s held on with large nuts.<br />
<span class="quote speech">Do we have a wrench or something?</span><br />
Jack looks around.<br />
<span class="quote speech">I don&apos;t know. Lemme take a look inside
there...</span><br />
He disappears through where used to be a door. After a moment, he
reappears, triumphantly holding a large adjustable wrench.<br />
He disappears through an opening in the wall where used to be a door.
After a moment, he reappears, triumphantly holding a large adjustable
wrench.<br />
<span class="quote speech">It&apos;s a bit rusty but should do the
job.</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">I&apos;m afraid to see what you call very
rusty.</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">This thing, for example.</span><br />
He knocks it against the ladder on the side of the tank causing more
pieces to break off. Then, he hands the wrench to her. After a bit of
He knocks it against the side of the tank causing more pieces of the
ladder to break off. Then, he hands the wrench to her. After a bit of
fiddling, she manages to get a good grip on one of the nuts holding the
lid in place - it doesn&apos;t budge.<br />
<span class="quote speech">Need a hammer or something?</span><br />
@ -54,8 +54,9 @@
Jack picks up a section of metal pipe and passes it to her. Putting it
over the wrench for additional leverage, she pushes against it until the
bolt snaps with a bang.<br />
<span class="quote speech">Well that&apos;s one way for that to come
off.</span>
<span class="quote speech">That&apos;s certainly one of the ways to undo
a nut.</span><br />
She moves on to the next one.
</p>
<p class="comment">
missing section: Michelle opens the lid and finds some disappointing
@ -83,7 +84,7 @@
</span> A few rows of large industrial shelves on the other side of the
hall hold partially rotting crates. On either side of the area with the
shelves are spacious areas with machine tools, small cranes, and other
machinery. A few plants grow here and there. A single train tack goes
machinery. A few plants grow here and there. A single train track goes
through the center of the hall with additional tracks for a gantry crane
to either side of it. At the end of the hall to the right, below the
rusty crane, sits a train wrapped up in tarps.
@ -91,15 +92,19 @@
<p>
<span class="quote speech">Stupid idea indeed</span>, she says while
walking towards it. Then, she corrects herself:
<span class="quote speech">Actually, it might not be that stupid. It
should have a generator that we can use.</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">That is if we can get it to a location where
it would be useful.</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">Is there a railroad close to the bunker?</span>
<br />
<span class="quote speech">Actually, it might be useful. That&apos;s one
of the diesel-electric ones, right?</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">Oh, I thought we drink the diesel and push
this thing around for fun.</span> He grins.<br />
<span class="quote speech">Okay, so can we use its generator?</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">Maybe, if we can get it to a location where
it's useful.</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">There is no railroad close to the
bunker?</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">Not that I know of, the closest would be
somewhere around Ivydale South.</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">Okay, not very useful. Let&apos;s go find a
truck then.</span>
<span class="quote speech">Okay, not very useful. That wasn&apos;t very
well planned, Mr infrastructure guy.</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">Let&apos;s go find a truck.</span>
</p>
<p class="copyright">Copyright &#169; 2023 Jan Danielzick (aka. BodgeMaster) &ndash; All rights reserved.</p><script>let spans = ["<span class=\"paper green\">", "<span>"]; let pre_texts = document.getElementsByTagName("pre"); for (let i = 0; i < pre_texts.length; i++) {if (pre_texts[i].className != "paper") continue; let lines = pre_texts[i].innerHTML.split("\n"); let result = ""; for (let j = 0; j < lines.length; j++) {result = result + spans[j%2] + lines[j] + " ".repeat(80-lines[j].length) + "</span>\n";} pre_texts[i].innerHTML = result;}</script></body></html>

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@ -94,8 +94,8 @@
I used to call home.</span>
</p>
<p class="comment">
At some point before this, Jack needs to tell her something along the
lines of &quot;No pity. I chose this life.&quot;
At some point before this chapter, Jack needs to tell her something
along the lines of &quot;No pity. I chose this life.&quot;
</p>
<p>
After pointing out some other notable landmarks, Jack decides it is time

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@ -1,95 +1,177 @@
This is very out of date. I'm gonna update this and remove the Markdown
formatting whenever I feel like it. Bu I ron't feel like it atm. ;)
Big-picture story overview:
===========================
Story begins on Tue, 2106-06-01
**Big-picture story overview:**
[partial] Jack wakes up
-> finds himself trapped in a bunker
-> leaves Michelle frozen
-> attempts to fix the door to get out
-> [missing] no tools, improvisation
-> tries and fails to get a service manual from the computer dur to a
broken hard drive
-> [implied] connects to the AgriWorks computer
[partial} Annie finds out about his situation
-> finds the terminal
-> [partial] figures out she (or anyone else for that matter) can't help
him directly
-> agrees to get him the manual
-> [partial] leaves work for the day
[needs revision] Annie goes to the library
-> she doesn't get the manual
-> instead, she gets a mysterious invite
[partial] Jack messes with the computer
-> [missing] inspects the damage on the hard drive
-> [missing] talks to Annie again
-> outcome of the library visit
-> Annie figures out shift and special chars
-> Annie asks a bunch of questions about Jack and his situation
-> [partial] Jack prints off the logbook
[partial] Secret organization meeting
-> Annie meets with Lucas
-> [needs revision] finds out that Karl is also part of the group
-> [needs revision] Lucas needs to go but leaves his keys
-> [change] He needs to leave immediately
-> [missing] He says something to the effect of "leave them at xyz
location when you're done"
-> [missing] They decide to steal the manual, not because they know that
that's the right type of door but because they want someone on the
outside for strategic reasons
-> talk about Jack
[needs revision] Annie and Isabelle steal the manual
-> [change] They search for the computer
-> They get the manual
-> They almost get caught
[missing] Annie and Karl contact Jack
-> Jack is reading the logs when the bell on the teleprinter dings
-> The logs need to make it very clear that, presumably, there are
still ppl living on the moon
-> the file contents of the stolen manual are gibberish
-> Jack takes a look at the file
-> turns out it's encrypted
-> Jack can write a program to break the encryption but for that to
be feasibly, they need a computer with a Number Cruncher 2000 card
-> Karl asks if Jack could/would open the airlocks from the outside
[missing] Next secret organization meetup
-> short interaction between Annie and Lucas
-> "You got your keys?" "I got my keys, thx."
-> relay the news from Jack
-> they decide to "borrow" a computer that has the right hardware
-> has to end with law enforcement arriving at the bar for an unrelated
reason and Kate telling them to gtfo
[partial] Emily intro
-> Emily wakes up, Lena is in her room crying
-> introduce the fact that there is a dangerous pathogen wreaking havoc on
the moon
-> ???
-> funeral
[missing] Annie stops working at AgriWorks
-> (this chapter can be moved to wherever is convenient)
-> Annie talks to Jack over the terminal. They talk about all sorts of
things, the outside world, the inside world, ... (this might be just
hinted at)
-> She falls asleep and gets found there the next day
-> She either gets let go or quits
[missing] secret organization plans the heist
-> new location (because day)
-> discussing two possible targets
-> discussing strategies for the heist
-> discussing what to do with the computer when they no longer need it
-> they obviously can't keep it so they will see if it's possible to
return it, if not get rid of it in another way
[missing] planning for getting the power plant documents to Jack
-> (this chapter can be moved to wherever it is convenient)
-> While talking to Jack, the idea of messing with the power plant comes up
-> Jack doesn't like the idea of a terrorist attack but he is open to the
idea of performing some unscheduled but clearly communicated
maintenance
-> They decide that Annie should meet up with Jack at a train station to
get him all the documentation he needs
[missing] The heist
-> four secret organization members pull up at the front entrance of a
company's building
-> Karl's friend backs his truck up agains the stairs leading to the door
-> two additional members arrive by other means
-> break-in
-> Annie, Isabelle, the company insider, and another member head inside
-> Karl and his friend wait outside
-> The group inside makes quick work of getting all the things
-> quick double check that the Number Cruncher 2000 is in the computer
-> Annie and Isabelle push the computer
-> The company insider collects all sorts of random bits and bobs
-> The other guy carries a terminal
-> they disperse in all directions
[missing] setting up the computer at Karl's place
-> TV on with news about the heist
-> They hook it up to a modem so that Jack can get his program ready
[missing] Some moon scene
-> Idk what exactly but it shows that Lena doesn't like the lab mice
(this is relevant later)
[missing] Opening the bunker door
-> Jack goes outside and takes a look around
-> wakes up Michelle
[partial] Exploring the Ivydale area
-> ???
-> exploring the train yard
-> finding fuel
-> find an intact metro train
[missing] returning the stolen computer
-> they get caught and run
-> leave the computer at the side entrance
-> some ppl get arrested (Lucas?)
-> another news segment along the lines of "In a bizarre turn of events..."
[partial] Annie meets Jack
-> Jack drives a train into the dome
-> original plan was for Annie to hand over the documents
-> police are at Annie's drop-off point, arresting Karl's friend
-> she stays on the train and leave the city
[partial] Annie sees the outside world for the first time
-> Annie enjoys the view from the side of the valley
-> They make their way to where used to be a bridge and climb down
-> continue towards the bunker
[missing] James the nomad shows up at the bunker with his dog
-> looking for the Sentinel Shores observatory
-> decides he's gonna stay for the night
-> playing with the dog
-> Jack and Annie arrive
-> food
-> talk about the before times
-> James decides to postpone his trip to Sentinel Shores, the bunker has
turned out to be more interesting than expected
[missing] failing to get in touch with the moon
-> Jack and Michelle troubleshoot
-> reading logs
-> computer equipment is fine
-> They go outside to inspect the dish
-> a river has wreaked havoc on important comms equipment
-> decision to check out the Sentinel Shores observatory
[missing] Trip to Sentinel Shores
-> The comms eqipment looks good but all computer erquipment missing
-> talk about where to get computers from
-> James suggests the datacenter in Rogue Tides
* Story begins on Tue, 2106-06-01
* \[partial\] Jack wakes up and contacts Annie, in the end he asks for a manual for the door
* \[partial\] Annie goes to the library but doesn't get the manual - instead she gets a mysterious invite
* \[missing\] Annie talks to Jack again at work
* Annie figures out how to use a keyboard properly
* Potentially written from Jack's perspective as not much of interest happens on Annie's side
* he could do something else as well, maybe working on improvising tools before or after talking to Annie
* \[partial\] Annie gets introduced to secret organization, learns that Karl is also part of it
* \[partial\] Lucas gives Annie the keys for the library and instructions on where to find the relevant computers
* for some reason he can't go get the manual himself (needs to be at an important event or something)
* Karl doesn't join bc he can't run if things go south, but he does give her a list of useful UNIX commands and a run-down of how to get one of these computers started
* They talk about Jack and why they would help him
* \[partial\] Annie gets the manual and drops it off at Karl's place
* she puts a note and the floppy disk into his mailbox
* \[missing\] Next morning from Jack's perspective
* incoming connection from Karl
* he says that Annie has procured a floppy disk with the manual
* it's not readable / the file is just gibberish
* Jack gets a copy of the header and determines it's encrypted
* he tells Karl that he can probably write a program to break the encryption but it's gonna take a powerful computer to do it within a reasonable time
* The ideal computer for this task has a Number Cruncher 3000 card and lots of memory
* Karl says he'll get back to Jack
* \[missing\] Next secret organization meetup
* Annie gives the keys back
* they come up with the idea of stealing a minicomputer from some company that someone has a link to
* also the idea comes up that they could ask Jack to help them in return for them helping him to get out
* has to end with law enforcement arriving at the bar for an unrelated reason and Kate telling them to gtfo
* \[partial\] Emily intro
* Before this chapter, there needs to be some sort of hint of what is coming (for example, Jack mentions the moon habitat or Annie asks why he was frozen)
* Emily wakes up, Lena is in her room crying
* introduces that ppl die from some disease on the moon
* breakfast
* funeral
* \[missing\] Annie talks to Jack again from the terminal at work
* she falls asleep
* next day she gets found there, someone makes a remark like "Why the sudden career change?"
* Annie thinks about it for a moment before replying "Actually, brilliant idea..." and quitting
* She leaves work and heads somewhere to meet up with secret organization members
* \[missing\] secret organization does secret organization things...
* new location (because day)
* who is there?
* preparations for the heist
* plans for Annie to meet Jack
* Jack will need some secret documents to help them (for messing with the power supply of the city)
* they decide to meet on a train
* Jack says he knows ways to get in and out
* \[missing\] Jack finishes writing the program and sends it to Karl
* \[missing\] the heist
* Annie, Isabelle, Lucas, and the inside contact go in and collect equipment and bring it to the front door
* Karl's friend is waiting to load it into the back of his pickup truck
* Karl is behind the wheel ready to take off
* once everything is loaded up, Karl's friend gets into the truck and everyone disperses in different directions
* they almost get caught
* Maybe Lucas and one other member of the secret organization stay behind to buy the others time and get arrested
* \[missing\] next morning, they set up the computer at Karl's place
* something in the news about a stolen computer lol
* "Hmm I wonder who could that have been? We wouldn't know where it is..."
* they break the encryption of the floppy disk (takes like three days)
* *\[missing\] some moon scene, possibly something that shows that Lena doesn't like the lab mice*
* \[missing\] Jack gets the bunker door open and wakes up Michelle
* they explore the Ivydale area
* find a working metro train somewhere that only needs some mild fixing up
* This may or may not remain unknown to Annie
* \[missing\] meanwhile, the secret organization works on getting the computer equipment back to its rightful owners
* they get caught and run/gtfo, leaving the computer at the front entrance
* there will have to be another news segment, something like this:
* "In a bizarre turn of events, members of a suspected terrorist group have returned the stolen computer to xyz corp. It had been stolen from their headquarters four days prior..."
* \[partial\] Annie meets Jack
* Jack drives a train into the dome
* original plan was to meet on a train and hand over the documents
* things go wrong and Annie ends up leaving the dome with Jack
* Annie sees the outside world for the first time
* \[missing\] James the nomad shows up with his dog
* only Michelle is there, Jack and Annie are still on their way
* He is mildly obsessed with space after seeing all sorts of images taken with telescopes
* on his way to Sentinel Shores because the observatory there is supposedly somewhat intact
* he wants to see if he can make a telescope work
* Something happens that will convince him to stay at the bunker
* possibly the topic of the moon base gets discussed
* \[missing\] Jack and Michelle will be working on getting in touch with the moon
* turns out their communications dish and equipment is far too gone to be repaired due to a river changing course or some other destructive event
* James suggests they should check out the observatory in Sentinel Shores
* \[missing\] They go on a "day trip" to Sentinel Shores to take a look at the observatory
* looks good but missing any kind of computer equipment (looted after or removed before the apocalypse)
* has an optical telescope and a dish
* when talking about the lack of computers, the nomad remembers that he saw a lot of computer stuff in Rogue Tides
* *... missing things (not in order):*
* *power plant shenanigans*
* *secret organization has to do things like putting up banners in high-profile locations and/or distribute a manifesto*
@ -118,33 +200,17 @@ formatting whenever I feel like it. Bu I ron't feel like it atm. ;)
* she realizes that she is descending waay too fast and tries mentally going through the emergency checklist
* Emily lands
**Individual missions:**
* Underground organization (Annie, Librarian, Karl)
* from the underground city
* want the underground city to open up again
* they come up with the plan that Annie should escape the city since she has the contact with Jack anyway so that they can gather some intelligence on what's going on outside
* Annie discovers the hydro power plant - they end up messing with the power supply of the dome to force officials to stop the isolation
* Neotek Dynamics (Jack, Michelle)
* mission to get into contact with moon base to check in on them
* turns out the moon base is having a real bad time and everyone is dying
* There used to be many ppl but at the start of the story just a few are left
* the rest died of some disease caused by a dangerous pathogen
* the remaining ppl are infected and sick
* all but Emily will die
* Emily will recover and make her way down to Earth in an escape capsule
* she escapes the capsule with a parachute and the capsule leaves a crater in the ground
* James
* has found space images and is mildly obsessed with them
* has heard of a somewhat intact observatory in Sentinel Shores
Scene Ideas:
============
**Scene ideas:**
Annie, in her search for an alternative to whatever the underground city
has as "coffee", obtains some drug from the electronics tinkerer. She
proceeds to get high as the sky and gets herself into a dangerous
situation before the others catch on to what's happening. Jack will end up
more or less forcing her back to the base and sit there watching her so she
doesn't do anything stupid.
* Annie, in her search for an alternative to whatever the underground city has as "coffee", obtains some drug from the electronics tinkerer. She proceeds to get high as the sky and gets herself into a dangerous situation before the others catch on to what's happening. Jack will end up more or less forcing her back to the base and sit there watching her so she doesn't do anything stupid.
* Emily wakes up. A relative is waiting in her room, silently crying. Emily, catching on to what's going on (and having experienced the bad news of the past how ever many weeks, months, or years), asks who died this time. Some other person, Idk. That leaves 5 alive ppl in the moon base.
* Followed by a moon funeral? Idk.
* When Emily recovers (in a different chapter), Lena says something to the effect of "that should have killed you".
* same chapter should have a dialog about how Lena took care of the mice despite originally not being too fond of them
* Lena dies sitting against a boulder next to the grave of her spouse. Emily sits there with her, periodically exchanging oxygen canisters until she dies. They talk over the radio. Lena tells her that she was ultimately right to use what Tony had left behind but it is too late for her now. After she dies, Emily returns to the base and lies down on the floor in a central room looking out though the ceiling for who knows how long (not eating or drinking for like 6h or so).
* Something should happen that gets her to get up and realize how incredibly hungry she is - possibly an incoming call / terminal beep from Earth
* Emily is alone, preparing for her descent to Earth. As part of the preparations, she releases the remaining lab mice into the biosphere module (they came from there originally).
Emily is alone, preparing for her descent to Earth. As part of the
preparations, she releases the remaining lab mice into the biosphere
module (they came from there originally).

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@ -1,76 +1,13 @@
<!DOCTYPE html><html><head><title> &lt;Emily Lab Incident&gt; </title><link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="html_resources/style.css"></head><body><a href="index.html"><button class="back">&lt;</button></a>
<!DOCTYPE html><html><head><title> Lab Rat </title><link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="html_resources/style.css"></head><body><a href="index.html"><button class="back">&lt;</button></a>
<h1> &lt;Emily Lab Incident&gt; </h1>
<p class="comment">
If you are here for reading, skip past the outline.
</p>
<p class="comment">
Outline:
</p>
<ul>
<li class="comment">
At this point, there are three survivors on the moon base:
<ul>
<li class="comment">
Emily
</li>
<li class="comment">
Lena
</li>
<li class="comment">
other crew member
</li>
</ul>
</li>
<li class="comment">
The other crew member is close to dying
</li>
<li class="comment">
Begin with dialog
</li>
<li class="comment">
Emily grabs a hammer and runs through the base followed by Lena
</li>
<li class="comment">
She reaches the lab and smashes the control panel for the dorr while
running inside causing the door to close and lock
</li>
<li class="comment">
She drinks some left over chemical concoction
<ul>
<li class="comment">
possibly after messing with it following some instructions she finds
</li>
</ul>
</li>
<li class="comment">
Lena starts to break the door open, the other person just arrives there
</li>
<li class="comment">
Emily&apos;s body is filled with pain and she falls to the floor
</li>
<li class="comment">
the door gets broken open just before she drifts out of consciousness
</li>
<li class="comment">
she drifts in and out of consciousness
<ul>
<li class="comment">
getting carried down the hallway
</li>
<li class="comment">
in her bed vomiting
</li>
</ul>
</li>
</ul>
<h1> Lab Rat </h1>
<p>
<span class="quote speech">Why not?</span><br />
Emily looks back and forth between Lena and Sasha.<br />
<span class="quote speech">Tony said he had some success with his mice,
why shouldn&apos;t we try it?</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">Tony also died after</span> &ndash; Sasha is
interrupted by coughing &ndash; <span class="quote speech">after trying it
<span class="quote speech">Tony also died after...</span> Sasha is
interrupted by coughing. <span class="quote speech">...after trying it
on himself.</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">Not like anything else is gonna happen to
us...</span><br />

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@ -2,34 +2,39 @@
<h1> Basic Needs</h1>
<p>
Jack drives into a dried-out river. A bit away from the other side is a
group of houses that &ndash; while they have certainly seen better days
&ndash; aren&apos;t ruins. The truck struggles to get traction in the
sand on the other side of the river bed. After getting stuck, he backs up
and turns into the river. He accelerates, the engine roars, then he
steers it back onto the side of the river. The truck gets stuck again.
This process repeats twice more before they finally make it out and back
onto the tall grass that covers the area. Jack drives over to the remains
of a road that lead to the settlement.
Jack drives into a dried-out river. In the distance on the other side is
a group of houses that, while they have certainly seen better days,
don&apos;t look abandoned. The truck struggles to get traction in the
sand on the other side of the river bed. After getting stuck, Jack backs
up and turns into the river. He accelerates, then steers back onto the
river bank &ndash; to no avail. He turns back into the river again.
The engine roars. First gear, second gear, third gear... Then, he steers
back into the side of the river. <span class="comment">rephrase bc
repetetiveness</span>
</p>
<p>
The suspension bottoms out as the truck plows uphill through the sand,
barely making it out of the river. Annie holds her shoulder that had
been pushed into the seat belt.<br />
<span class="quote speech">Can we not do that again, please?</span><br />
<span class="comment">response?</span><br />
Jack turns around and drives onto the overgrown remains of a road leading
to the settlement.
</p>
<p>
He parks in front of an old store.<br />
<span class="quote speech">This is it, I guess.</span><br />
They get out and start walking towards the door. A small dog runs up to
greet them, jumping around, running in circles, and wagging its tail.
them, barking, jumping around, running in circles, and wagging its tail.
It picks up a stick and drops it in front of Annie. She crouches down,
pets the dog, and picks up the stick. The dog bites into the other end
and pulls on it.<br />
<span class="comment">note: need reason for Jack to go ahead, also better
wording</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">I&apos;ll be inside.</span><br />
Jack goes into the store.
pets the dog, and picks up the stick.<br />
<span class="quote speech">I&apos;ll be right there</span>, Annie says
to Jack before throwing it.<br />
<span class="quote speech">Okay.</span> Jack goes into the store.
</p>
<p>
<span class="comment">note: need to state that the man appears to be in
his 60s</span><br />
After playing with the dog for a bit, Annie follows. The man behind the
counter is talking to Jack:<br />
After playing fetch for a bit, Annie follows. Behind the counter is a man
who appears to be in his 60s. He is talking to Jack:<br />
<span class="quote speech">I mean in the long run. We have plenty of food
right now but, since the &lt;river name&gt; has changed course, we
don&apos;t even have enough water to grow crops for ourselves. The
@ -45,7 +50,7 @@
<span class="quote speech">Listen, we don&apos;t just need a little bit of
water. The amount of water we need can&apos;t simply be carried here or
we&apos;d do it ourselves. And we need it regularly and consistently.
When the &lt;river&gt; still flowed here, water userd to flow into our
When the &lt;river&gt; still flowed here, water used to flow into our
irrigation system upstream and got distributed to all the fields and
greenhouses from there.</span><br />
<span class="quote speech">I know you need an industrial quantity of

View File

@ -150,11 +150,33 @@
through the airlock and looks for a full oxygen bottle. She lifts one
out of its rack and carries it back to Lena. She opens the life support
unit and closes the valves on it and the empty bottle, then she replaces
it and opens the valves again. <br /><span class="comment">
missing: Emily&apos;s LSU is also empty. She replaces the oxygen bottle
and returns, sitting down next to Lena for company.</span>
it and opens the valves again. Just as she is done with that, her own
alarm goes off. <span class="comment">Disappointed/annoyed reaction</span>
</p>
<p class="comment">
missing: time jump, Lena dies, etc.
Emily sits down next to Lena again, but there is no conversation.
</p>
<p>
Emily looks at Lena &ndash; she had closed her eyes. As if she knew Emily
was looking she opens them, looking directly at her.
<span class="comment">Gripping?</span> her hand as she speaks.
<span class="comment">some meaningful last words?</span> Then she lets go
and closes her eyes again. A couple minutes later, she stops breathing.
<span class="comment">wording</span>
</p>
<p class="comment">
Emily sits next to Lena for a while, completely out of it, her mind
being numb.
</p>
<p>
Her oxygen alarm goes off. Absentmindedly, she gets up and returns to
the habitat. She opens the air lock, enters, closes the outside, and
enters the inside. As she is putting away her suit, she realizes that
she had been following the procedures from muscle memory without even
thinking about them. She walks to the <span class="comment">???</span>
module and lays down on the floor staring into the sky.
<span class="comment">This module has to be described at some point
before this. It has panorama windows to all sides and a glass ceiling.
</span>
</p>
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